Om de een of andere reden wilde ik deze brief met jullie delen, een afscheidsbrief aan mijn ex, het face to face afscheid moet nog komen, volgende week.Tot nog toe zagen we elkaar nog af en toe maar daar gaat nu dus verandering in komen.Ik hoop dat jullie engels goed genoeg is , lees in ieder geval even het gedicht dat onderaan de brief staat.
Ik wou dat ik het zelf geschreven had, schitterend!(- Dave Stout -)

Dear xxx,

The reason for writing you this e-mail is because the next time I will see you, I will not like to start to discuss any topic that can trigger my stupid crying in front of you again.
You have seen far to much of this already and I hate myself for it, the last part of respect for me will be gone maar ja?¢‚Ǩ¬¶?¢‚Ǩ¬¶?¢‚Ǩ¬¶..

Still there are some things I have to let you know.

On our last conversation on Monday, I told you I have the idea that breaking the contact between us for now seems to me the best thing to do for both of us at this moment.
For you not to be confronted with a sad face and memories of the past, for me to have time to heal the pain. It's maybe not easy to understand for you that I take it so hard because for you it was already some time ago when you made the decision not to try again to spend your live with me. Also the fact that you where never alone to fully feel the consequence or pain of that decision, the moment you took the decision you where already In love and together with your boyfriend, makes it a lot different to handle I guess. Not to speak of the simple fact that I was the one who got dumped. For me, you where still the one and only.

Like you have sad a couple of times this year, while being patient and hopefully not to bored, listening to me , I think it's now time for me to say:

" I understand everything"

In general it should be something like :

You don't marry someone you can live with,
you marry the person who you cannot live without.

The simple fact that I understand this, doesn't, take the love, hope and dreams that I have away from one day to another. My head tells me lot's of smart and useful stuff, the books I read are great I can find so much in it, the people I meet and talk to can give me such good advice, but my soul, my feeling, my hart grrrrrrrrrr , wish it was fast like my mind, but for now it's not.

I came to the conclusion(maybe you already came to the same conclusion long time ago but felt pity with me or wanted to help me dealing with it?) that it's really better for both of us if we break the contact for now, at least as far as possible. If there is a urgent matter(bad health problem,papers, or anything else that you really need my help with or feel you have to share with me)then don't hesitate to call me.

xxx, I don't hate you, I am not trying to make things difficult, I just try to find a way to get well as soon as possible. It pains me a lot and I hate myself for writing this letter to you but I don't see any other way out!
I will work hard to get myself back on track again, I hope by the time that I am, we can still be good friends. I hope time/live won't change us that much that one of us or both of us, will lose interest in each other and I hope you won't take it in a offensive way.

I hope that this is all ok with you, replying is not your specialty again, witch I can understand but do me a favour if there is anything you want to say then do so.

By sharing this with you my chest should be clean enough for a last meeting
(for now) without tears, so I hope you will still grant me the pleasure and honour of a cup off thee to celebrate your birthday, if possible next week Monday, a bit early but still better then some other time that I am still ashamed about ?جÅ?†.

I won't push you to come to see the fish with me, those kind of drama- roman-tic ways of ending a story are good for books or movies, probably not for a girl that has already found new love.

The Gift Of Knowing You

There are gifts of many treasures
For both the young and old,
From the tiniest little trinkets
To great boxes filled with gold.

But, put them all together
And they could not stand in lieu,
Of the greatest gift of all
The gift of knowing you.

When your times are filled with troubles
Sadness, grief, or even doubt,
When all those things you planned on
Just aren't turning out.

Just turn and look behind you
From the place at which you stand,
And look for me through the shadows
And reach out for my hand.

I will lift from you your burden
And cry for you your tears,
Bear the pain of all your sorrows
Though it may be for a thousand years.

For in the end I would be happy
To have helped you start anew,
It's a small price to pay
For the gift of knowing you.

Olaf